Starting Over To Become A Better Me

I love, love, love the idea of everyday adventures and unseen beauty. Oh how I wish my life could be that! I wish those were things that really exemplified my life - searching for unseen beauty in things that may not be so lovely and seeking out everyday adventures in the mundane. It just doesn't seem like that is where I am though. Maybe it is where I was and maybe where I'll circle back to in a different season. Right now though, that's not the season I'm in. It's not where my heart is. I think I just need to start over and work on becoming a better version of myself.

Why Start Over?

I believe it's a season of changes, healing and restoration. It's also an incredibly challenging time of sorting out of the identity of who I've become versus who I wish I had become or could become. I'm questioning my current life path. I'm seeking out past hobbies that once brought me joy and looking at them in a new light. Due to all of this and the switching of priorities of taking care of family matters first instead of working for a career, it's time for a fresh start, a new chance at who I wish I'd become. Some days, I have the desire to look at my life penciled on a page and start ferociously erasing. Afterwards, I'm left with imprinted scratches and a somewhat new-ish slate. It's something I can start over with. With each pencil stroke, I can begin to build something new, something better.

Why Becoming A better Me Starting Today?

As this journey has started, one thing has become incredibly evident. I have changed significantly over the past several years. Unfortunately, I think the vast majority of these changes aren't for the better. I'm not saying that I believe I need to be the perfect woman juggling her career, kids, faith, home, friends, family and everything else with exact and precise balance while living each moment with intentionality. There are areas of my life that I feel like I'm not good at though, that I feel like need improving. I don't feel like I live each day with intentionality. The thought patterns I've developed over time could use a major overhaul. I don't give myself grace, yet I know I need to learn to do so. These things won't change overnight, but I believe I can start to become a better version of myself one day at a time starting today.

What Does Becoming A Better Me Look Like?

In short, I have no idea. So many areas of my life that need redemption. From my questioning faith after seeing so many Christian failures as well as my floundering relationship with Jesus to a new healthy lifestyle that isn't filled with pinned workouts while I'm seeing how many donuts I can eat in one sitting. Due to my love of research and reading. I know that research and reading will play heavy roles on this journey. I know being truthful, honest and eagerly seeking out answers will be on the way. This journey will be filled with changing things/habits/thoughts/routines, trying new things/foods/workouts and discovering that even an older dog can learn new tricks. The cool thing is that each day is new and what becoming a better me looks like today may be different in a year or so depending on the season. Grab my hand and let's journey together!